Omit The Passe In Her

The soundless scream inside her heart,
Her soul caged in the red dot of the dart,
She hides her beauty, under her lipstick,
Her eyes speak loud about her stake.

Did she know who he was?
The man, she thought, would never rift her heart.
Came to her day, dreams of the night,
For the innocence, she carries in her smile.
He dazed her, with his charm,
Engaged her, into his potent.
Seduce her every part, with his lingering eyes.

She forthright to make him, her sweetheart.
He gifts her, the red scarf and strawberries fill a jar.
Kisses her mouth, doped her senses.
She surrenders everything to him.

One day, instantaneously he was gone, who had promised to stay, not vamoose any day.

Her thoughts were certitude, is it an illusion?

She covers her face, concealed in his memories, cried overnight, could not decide, what to do and where to go!

What is her mistake, that she loved the temporal feeling with him or gazed the unseeing trait of him?
Now, she is precocious, it is hard for her to trust this world. Those were the Nadir days of her life; her hibernation was not audible to anyone.
She kept working on herself, overtly welcomed the positivity in her life, and tried to find those little missing smiles.

Well, what happened was not her mistake, it was a phase that taught her to be stronger than before, gratis her fear, entered into the skin of fortitude and enamored of the beauty in her.
Today, her face has a winsome smile, and she has regained it all by herself.

©Rashmi Tiwari

WHAT IF?

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A book on the table that reads

“Something that can change your heart, something that is magical”

“All these statements look good in fiction, not in reality,” she said.

“Have you tried the what-if technique?” I asked.

“What is that by the way?” she said.

“Ahaan! See, in this way you have to imagine yourself in a place that you always want to be”, he replied.

She was still looking in the books, even not trying to look into my eyes, and I was waiting for her. Even after so many years, she is still the same, the same girl who made me smile when I never wanted to. I never looked back, after I met her. She is my true happiness because when I imagine or think of her, I smile automatically. She is the epitome of unconventional love. I every day want to see her and want to keep her close to my heart.

“Imagine, what if, we are together, sleeping under the night sky, holding our hands. What you will do?” I said.

“What if I feel cold?” She replied.

“What if, we are so close that even cold cannot come in between us “, I said.

“What if, I ask you a silly question”, she said.

“What if, I would love to hear that silly question at 3 is, under the night sky, “I said.

“What if, our eyes met,” She replied.

“What if, I catch your sight, and start talking about the US,” I said.

“What if, the US is temporary, “She said.

“What if, we hold each other to make it eternal,” I said.

“What if, I cracked a joke,” She asked.

“What if, I tell you, that I am really bad at cracking jokes”, I said.

“What if, I spoke the three magical words, “She asked.

“What if, it is already spoken by your heartbeats,” I said.

“What if, I hugged you tightly,” She said.

“What if, that will be the beginning of our love,” I said.

“What if, it is already started,” she said and blushed.

“What if, we can live that moment, right now,” I replied.

“What if, we are living,” she said.

“Then, I will close your eyes and kiss you,” I said.

I gently kissed her lines of beauty and we were lost in our dreams.

She made me this smiling person. Thanks to all those lovely relations that uplift us in life. There are very few true relations, and learn to treasure them. Every phase is important to experience, even if it is love or heartbreak. Life will teach you all lessons, and yes, wait for surprises, life will bring you more from what you desire and more of what you deserve.

 

Random thoughts of Love

I am waiting for his call. It isn’t in my control, when or at what time he is going to call me. I miss him every day, you know just like the smile on a happy face. I miss his voice, I remember when I hear him for the first time. His voice was familiar, soft, calm and sweet like I have known him for ages. I asked him, “Did you like sweet?“.
He laughed and said, “No Lady, I don’t”.
I have seen him on a beautiful morning. He was leaving for his journey ahead. I really don’t like saying Good Bye to him.

I realise then, it requires a lot of patience and courage to be connected to someone who lives so far. I see people around me, dating just for fun, committing for the relationship, which is a temporary show, faking to someone who already is in deep love with you. What I should say to them?
The only one faith that is LOVE for your love, which connects you with him/her. It’s a powerful energy, which can uplift you to become the best version of yourself. It is a magical experience if you are in love with the right person.

He is the right one for me. He left for his work and I collected the beautiful memories of him. I recalled every small moments with him, which made me so happy. The feeling of happiness, home is in his arms – left side where I can keep my head and listen to his heart beat. The aroma of his body. I love him, I love his thoughts, which shaped me into a beautiful and a strong woman.

The few links in the long distance is how much connected you are. Can you understand me even if I don’t speak what actually happened to me?

He says to me, “Jaha Dil lag Jaye, waha Dimag nhi lagana chaiye”(There should not be brain where there is a heart). From where exactly you get these thoughts?

A long distance should never be disturbed by a third person, even it’s family or friends.
Stop questioning him/her or yourself in terms of degrading your ability. Your relationship is in your hand. You can make it lovely or destroy it within few seconds. Releasing negative thoughts are really important. If you think, it’s not gonna work, it’s really not gonna work. If you approach any relationship with positivity, even a bitter relationship can transform into magical.

Yes, he is a musician , I am his instrument, while he plays using his fingers. It’s a sound of pleasure and love. I can feel it, it’s an epitome of love and precious to me.

Let me see you, after my long journey in transformation into a beautiful and positive person. He is a gift from Universe that has been answered in my prayers.

Every love story is beautiful, finding love in life is real present from God. Those who don’t have love right now in their life, wait patiently, it’s on the way, the deep love is within you, find it and embrace it.
Love you All 😊

© Rashmi Tiwari

Chhath Puja – Festival of Beliefs

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Chhath Puja is the ancient Hindu Vedic Festival celebrated in Indian states of Bihar, Jharkhand, Uttar Pradesh, West Bengal and some regions of Nepal  The Chhath Puja is a festival of power and beliefs. The puja is dedicated to Sun and his wives Usha, Sandhya in order to thank them for their existence which is prospering the life on earth and to request for granting certain wishes.
The most important thing that, this Puja doesn’t involve idol worship.

This festival is celebrated on Kartika Shukla Shashthi which is the sixth day of Kartika month. That is why it refers as “Chhath”-on the sixth day . It is also celebrated in the month of Chaitra.

The puja consists of four days. This include of holy bathing, fasting and performing Vratta(abstaining from drinking water), standing in water for long period of time and giving “Arghya” to the setting and rising sun. The first day of Chhath Puja starts exactly after 4 days from Diwali, known as “Naha-Kha”. The devotees(performing the Vratta) take bath and prepare food which consists of rice, dal and bottle gourd(pure veg).

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The second day of Chhath Puja is known as Kharna. Vratti’s keep fasting for the day without even taking water. In the evening they prepare kheer(rice with milk) and roti. They eat the kheer-roti after doing puja to rising moon and Goddesses Ganga. This is the only time when Vratti’s eat or drink anything from starting day till the last day of Chhath.

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The third day of Chhath Puja is the festival day. The devotees performed nirjal vrath(without eating and drinking), which consists of going on river bank and giving argha to the setting sun. In argha they offer fruits, tekhua, ghajur in kalsup. After giving argha they make a kosi(consists of sugarcanes(5) in a tent shape, an elephant made up of earthen soil, lighten Diyas and keep puri on them).

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The fourth day is the final festival day. The devotees give argha to the rising sun in morning reaching to the bank of river. This fast lasts upto an overall of 42 hours without food and water. That is why those who do this fast are with powerful souls and treated like god. This festival is performed by both women and men.
This is the only festival which signifies both rising and setting sun.

Chhath puja is above the concept of Murti Pujan that is very common in the Hinduism. Some people believe “Sun is necessary for living, for every creature on Earth. This festival is the only way to thank the nature”.

There is a strong believe in this Puja that Chhath Maiya fulfil the wishes of everyone(related to anything) if prayed with all heart.

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I am lucky that in my family my Iaa(Dadi), Maa, Papa, Chachi’s, Fua, Mausi do this Vrath. It’s a blessing to see Chhath Puja. May Chhath Maiya showers her peace and blessing to everyone.

© Rashmi Tiwari

Where were you ?

IMG-20181028-WA0140Hidden in the Iceland, chaotic of your own self. Where were you ? I was finding, standing alone on the bridge which had a time for the train to come. I wait everyday! For you to come back. I still have the time in mind of what we had.

Where were you ? Never thought that I might be waiting for you. The smell of your body which remains in me. Have you ever discovered that, why its just me ? Why haven’t I moved on, why I am still waiting ? Waiting for you, who’s just not me.

Where were you ? When I needed you the most, I cried whole nights and my pillow was holding me there. There is need of love from you. But you are finding the right stars at wrong place. If you have got me then why finding the reason to leave?

© Rashmi Tiwari

THROWN AWAY

The One Way Talks

Due to one he was thrown away from everyone.
Due to one he was thrown away to everyone.

Two Lines, very different but one thing in common “BREAKING OF TRUST”

Dec 13th, 2017
There was a girl upset in the corridor, who is she, who is she?.,

A curiosity of you did I sneak
my entire world went at peak
came and stand by your side
when your mind was upset aside.
Our feelings accidentally fell on each other
I thought we were bound to be together.

You faked yourself and faked your friends
I had to be with them for the sake of yourself.
Cause of you my heart depart
I was thrown away apart.

STILL I WAS LITTLE HAPPY.,

Even after everyone was there
I was happy that your were there.
Somewhere accidentally got few stares
but your true feelings were un-aware.

Feb 18th, 2018

You showed me…

View original post 71 more words

The Love Letter

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“Letter came ?” I texted to Gauri.

“No yaar” she replied.

Why am I waiting for this letter ? There is a story behind this letter.
What is the fascination in writing letters ?
According to me, letters are the best way to express one’s heart and its helpful for the introverts to pen down their feelings.
The letter I wrote to him in which I have described about how from friendship my feelings has changed to crush.
When he was here in the same city, I never felt that way I was feeling now.
We met so many times had good memories together.
Eating together in weekends, endless talk about the politics and back bitching about people.
He was the abettor to me.
When he told me that he is shifting to a new city I was really sad.
That sadness was queer and unmanageable.

After 2 months I came in touch with him because I was his friend not the best friend. But for me he was more that just a friend. With him there was a spark that I was craving for , the way he understood me made the bond between us really strong.
I wish the thoughts running in my mind are the same in his.
One fine day he called me.

” Can I send you a letter ?” He questioned.

” Oh ! Yes you can send me ” I answered.

I wish I could come there and tell him that how much I love him

” I am sending cards to all my good friends. You are one of them. That’s why I want” he said.

” Okay ! I will wait for it . By the way I like writing letter. I always wanted someone who can reply me through letters ” I said , smiling.

” Wow. You never told me about this. I am also letter sender- receiver kind off person ” he replied.

We had an hour phone call that day, this was longest phone call I did with him. There were lots of similarities between us. When ever we don’t had anything to talk, we discuss about the similarities. I gave him my friend Gauri’s address because I was living with my family , I didn’t want them to receive that letter.

So, that’s why I was waiting for this letter. Somewhere I had an intuition that the letter is not just a simple piece of paper. It is going to be the expression of feelings handwritten which I was expecting from very long.

After 4 days my friend Gauri texted me by sending a picture of that letter and I zoomed in the FROM portion and his Name was there.
I was so excited to read that letter.

“Shall I open it for you 😛?” Gauri texted.

“No yaar. 🙈” I replied.

“Yes ! I was just joking. I am not coming tomorrow. I am ill ” Gauri texted.

“😒 ” I texted.

In all this universe , when his letter came this ma’am is now ill and she lives far from my place. Ignoring my all anger. I messaged her.

“Take care , get well soon” I texted.

Waiting for another 3 days. All this eagerness was on peak.
Finally my dear Gauri came. I took her college bag, took out the letter and ran outside the class.
I found one empty class room and sat quietly there.
Thoughts were running in my brain. What is the feeling he couldn’t expressed on the phone call.
That’s how the letter was

*” Hi Beautiful,
When I was there. I couldn’t felt the importance of yours in my life. I am missing you.
I miss how you used to call me whenever I was late in our meetings.
I miss how you adjust your hair while talking to me.
I miss how you laugh even on my lame jokes to make me feel good.
I miss how you sing sweet songs which I have secretly recorded.
I miss how you look gorgeous with that nose pin.
I miss how you look beautiful with that one stroke of Kajal.
I miss how you handle me whenever I miss my family.
I miss how you take my advices before making any decision.
I miss how you share all your peace, anger and disturbance with me.
I miss how you put your hand on my shoulder.
I miss how you care for me as a friend.
I miss you.
I miss everything about you.
A day has 24 hours and atleast 24 times I have missed you.
Dear I am sorry for not telling this you earlier. But I am in love with you.
With your soul.
I am in love with someone who knows I am not perfect but can make me complete.
A someone who has the clandestine quixotic tone.
A someone who is the narcotic in my nerves and panacea to cure.
A someone who is silent but has things to say.
A someone whom I wasn’t searching for.
A someone who is the best fortuitous thing happened to me.
A someone who makes me forgot the whole world.
A someone who makes me happy all the time.
A someone who pays attention to my useless talk.
A someone who is propinquity to my soul.

Now, I am changed because of you and becoming a more positive person in life. There was no appropriate way to express my feeling better than this. This letter is my proxy for you.
You know what, whenever I watch the night skies I found you dazzling around wearing the stars with the glow of moon.
I left all my pains behind and we drown into the ocean of love. A place where we imagined day and night to be together.
This is all my state without you.
You are the description of love. I imagined every moment sleeping on your lap , listening your melodious songs and you waving hands around my face.
You are the first home of my feelings where my imagination starts and it never ends. I am all yours.
Waiting for your answer.

Your Lover Boy
(Written by heart not by pen)”*

The last words written melted me. Finally, thank you god for fulfilling my wish. From where all this love he has shown?
Well, he is so good in writing that I never knew.
I called him.

“Hello. I got your letter” I said.

“Finally. Can you send your answer through letter?” He asked.

“Yes. I can. But, is it wrong to tell it now ?” I questioned.

“No its not wrong. You know what the emotions and feelings you express is through letters and that becomes the treasure for long distance lovers” He said.

“What what ? Long distance lovers huh !? ” I replied.

“Ya Haan. ” He giggled.

“Yes I will write ” I said.

“Desperately waiting for it, OK bye. Please behave like a 80s people and don’t do call-message till I receive your letter ” He said.

“OK ! Bye Handsome ” I said.

After his romantic letter it was my turn to reply him in my way.
So, I wrote the first half of the letter in a very simple way where I described how much I miss him after he is gone from the city.
That’s how my letter was

*”Hi handsome,
The letter you wrote is priceless. The so called treasure for the beginning of our love.
But, as the way we had made that “bond” and I have found that “spark” for which I was craving for so long.
Considering your love. Its beyond my imagination. There is a small hut in my heart where every morning you kiss my forehead. Holding me tightly through waist and then embracing me in your arms. As because of my short-height , I can hear your heartbeats expressing those lines you spoke to me.
I felt that there is telepathy between us. How we are able to connect and understand each other and somewhere in heart it was that you have the same feelings for me.
I am not a romantic letter writer. The only answer to your letter is
“I am all yours”
I love the way you are.
I love the way you encourage me when I am low.
I love the way you relax me whenever I over think.
I love the way you wear blue colour on every meeting.(As Blue is my Favourite)
I love the way you ask me to drive and you sit behind.
I love the way you said long distance lovers.
I love the real you.
I thank universe for giving me, You.

Your Lover Girl
(Written while looking at our pictures)”*

That’s how I end that letter by keeping my heart out.
I wasn’t messaging him neither he was. After 4 days he called.

“Hello. I am happiest when I’m with you” He said.

“Me too. So you got that letter.” I said.

“Yes ma’am. I had this intuition that you love me. But, maybe the destiny was in search for the right time. How things worked when we were together, we never felt the importance of each other” He said.

“And now as we are apart. But, together ” I replied.

” Thank you for everything Miss” He said.

“Thank you for that romantic letter” I said.

“I loved your treasure as well dear” he said.

“Thank you handsome” I replied.

“In letter we expressed it. Now, Shall we say this to each other ?” He asked.

“Yes. But I m somewhere outside” I said.

“Can’t you speak those three magical words by going in corner?” He questioned.

“Ok fine. ” I said.

“I love you” he said.

“Same to you” I replied.

“You spoiler” He laughed and said.
.
.
.
.
We had a long call that day and same to you had the another meaning for him ❤
We wrote many letters after that letter. Still the feeling for the first love letter is divine and novice ❤

© Rashmi Tiwari